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Corrie weekly updates from 1995, 17 years in 17 e-books
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Streetcars gets its own sweater girl (well, she makes Steve perspire)
when Veronica "Ronnie" Clayton turns up with the sort of looks – and cleavage
- you don't often see outside of a Hollywood B movie. She gets the
job as a new driver after Steve covers a couple of points at the interview
in an episode of Carry on Corrie Cabbie. When he surfaces for air,
the future looks bright for Steve until Lloyd gets a visit from Ronnie's
husband Jimmy, owner of rival firm Connect Cabs and general ne'er do well
of the parish. Jimmy tells Lloyd that if his good for nothing wife
should turn up looking for a job (snarl, menace, grimace) he'd rather they
didn't give her one. Too late, Steve already has, oh, at least once.
Ronnie tells Steve she's left husband Jimmy as he was beating her up and
now she's living in a B&B and needs work. Steve can't see why Lloyd's
so uptight about recruiting the new driver but that's because he hasn't yet
met (grimace, snarl) Jimmy.
Danny starts off lying to Frankie about his affair with Leanne but comes
clean soon enough when Frankie's not fooled. All this stuff has been
excellent, I almost shed a few tears during one of the episodes, the acting
was superb and the dialogue excellent. Anyway, Danny knows whatever
he says won't change what's happened so he appeals to Frankie to give him
another go. "I am a man and I am stupid" he says, which seems to
be the Corrie way for men on the cobbles. Wanted – male actor to
play stupid / feckless / wife-beating misogynist. Except of course
for the one they called the eco-warrier, now, he was different. But back
to the Baldwins. "It's in me genes babe, I carn't `elp it, luvaduck,
birds come and they go but ah loves ya Frankie…" etc. and then I'm afraid
I didn't catch the end of him pleading wiv her not to ruin all their lives
by telling Jamie his dad was having it off with his girlfriend because I
was playing with my new mobile phone. Yes, I have become the
sort of person I hate to sit next to on the train.
Cilla needs a wedding frock and hasn't the cash to buy one but does have
the balls to ask Shelley for hers. And she gets it too as Shelley
can't see the point of keeping it and is only too happy to give it away.
So now Cilla's got the frock, the fella and the Quo, the only thing left
to sort out is the church. After a fruitless search, Bev puts Les onto a
fella in the Weatherfield Arms, he's got a church of sorts although Bev admits
it's more of a cult. A cult, dear, keep up. Father Abraham, for
it is he, wears an "I heart Jesus" badge on the front of his jacket, has
"The End of the World is Nigh" on the back, a red neon cross in the church
and an action man with his kecks off. "It's representational" he tells
Cilla, who's trying to pick her face up off the floor when she sees the tin
hut Les wants them to get married in. A Battersby wedding indeed. Rock
on.
Pigs might fly but they won't be able to jump over Gail's new garden
fence. Jason puts a new fence in her garden to keep the Good Life
from encroaching over her side. It's a sunny day, she's feeling
relaxed so she sits in the garden with her feet in a foot spa that Phil
the six-foot foot fella has given her as a gift. As Gail drifts off
to sleep with her toes twirling, Eileen pops by to see how Jason's doing.
Jealous of Gail's relationship with Phil and spying wet concrete that Jason's
using, Eileen pours it in the foot spa so that when Gail wakes up
her feet have set hard into the mix. Oh how we laughed, almost. Is
Eileen really that evil? A bit sad maybe, a bit dowdy, a woman perhaps
who has lost her sparkle - but evil?
Martin's girlfriend - the one who's a football mascot not the one who's
a schoolgirl, turns up at his flat looking sultry after they argue in the
Rovers. How DO women do sultry like that? One hand on the hip,
eyes lowered, yes, I understand the theory. In practice though, when you
turn up at someone's front door, what do you do with your Sainsbury's bags
of shopping, the stray dog that's followed you down the street, the stream
of bus tickets stuck to your shoe? She can't stay long, she tells
him, she has to go home to do marking. "How do PE teachers do marking?"
we asked each other across the living room. "How do PE teachers do
marking?" Martin echoed on-screen. Anyway, it's all a ploy to get Martin
off with this woman, out of the Street and into gainful employment elsewhere.
Next!
In episode number two of Carry on the Cobbles this week, Diggory lusts
over Liz in the bakers shop. There's too many baked goods double
entendres I could use here so I won't even start, although they are all
quite funny. He gets her a bike and wants her out on the cobbles
delivering his wares. Liz quite rightly refuses, for now, and catches
the eye of another customer who comes in for a cream horn and leaves with
a tart (fnarr fnarr, oo-er missus etc., sorry, I know I said I wouldn't
but I couldn't help myself.) He's a young man, indeed much , much
younger than Liz but she's flattered to bits and goes on a hot date with
toy -boy.
And that's just about that for this week.
Glenda
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