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Cilla asks her mate Yana to be maid of honour when she marries Les later
this year. Off they go to celebrate at The Clock although Yana's
fella, Big H, is stuck on the M6 and has to miss out. Not realising
that they've ordered £70 bottles of wine, Cilla, Les and Yana knock
the booze back like cheap lager, heckling the staff and annoying fellow
diners. But the burning question this week is whether Big H is
related to Big Alice of Streetcars. Has anyone ever seen them
both in the same place at the same time? Or at all? I think
we should be told.
With Shelley's bruises fading, Bev reports Charlie to the police for beating
up her daughter. The police can't do anything unless Shelley
reports him herself so Bev's stumped as to what to do next. After spitting
and fighting with Charlie in the street, she exacts her revenge when
she moves onto the cobbles and installs herself behind the bar of the Weatherfield
Arms. When Shelley tries to get back downstairs to work: "I'm doing
it for Charlie", she panics on the stairs but when she rings Charlie he turns
off his phone. She's in a right state, stuck in her pyjamas and can't even
manage to put her make-up on straight. She blames her mother's presence
for messing up her head while Charlie plays her like a fiddle and the tune
don't sound good.
Liz's fella Bob returns for a second date with the glamourous granny.
Is he a glutton for punishment or a glutton for mutton? Steve's not
best pleased his mother's dating other men but Liz is happy to go wine-tasting
with Bob where she can volatise her esters, swirl and spit.
Tracy tells Steve she wants to move into his flat and live as a proper
family with him and Amy. "See, you need me!" she cries as she displays
the gleaming kitchen she's spent ages scrubbing - although you would
have thought the last thing Steve needed was another scrubber. When
Louise the Irish girl turns up in the Rovers, telling Steve she was passing,
he realises his feelings for Tracy are iffy and that he still has feelings
for Louise. He confides in Liz that he doesn't want Tracy to move into the flat and that
he's made a mistake in getting together with her at all. Meanwhile Tracy
bullies Blanche into getting rid of the Baldwins from her house at number
seven so she can move in there with Steve and the baby. But, against
his will and better judgement and through gritted teeth, Steve agrees to move
in. Firstly, because her inner gargoyle scares the bejesus out of him and
secondly, because he doesn't want to lose Amy. Needless to say, Liz
is gob-smacked by the news while the Baldwins check the small print of their
tenancy agreement.
After starting work at the corner shop last week, Sunita sacks Sally when
she finds out that Dev has cut her working hours now she's in the pudding club. "Sorry, Sally" says Sunita, alliteratively speaking.
Sally ends up working at Underworld as Danny needs a new machinist although
Sally thinks she's there as assistant deputy manager and that working on
the machines is her step up to glory, a biro and in-tray. Things go
wrong on her first day when Sally refuses to follow new girl routine and says
she won't make the coffee. Kelly gets revenge on the new stuck-up machinist
by putting perfume in her afternoon tea and telling her it's Lapsang Souchong
(weren't they a band in the 80s?).
There's war at the Websters when Rosie decides to turn vegetarian. Sally
takes it personally and does a great turn as James Mason from `Spring and
Port Wine' - when Rosie refuses to eat her lamb chop for dinner, control
freak Sally serves it up for breakfast.
And that's just about that for this week.
Glenda
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