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Corrie weekly updates from 1995
17 years in 17 e-books
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There’s underhand dealings at Underworld when sacked knicker-stitcher Joanne
is paid off with a cheque for five grand. That’s after she threatens to
sue Carla for unfair dismissal and Liam for sexual harassment, but Carla
knows how Joanne’s mind works, offers her the cheque and sits back in her
office chair to lick thorns and trim the heads of her roses. I bet she’s even
got a screensaver on her PC that shows little kittens being drowned. Has
Corrie ever had such a witch? (watchable though she is). Anyway, it was clear
that Carla was going to win this fight, she was wearing bigger hoopy ear-rings
than Joanne, it’s always a sign of a clear winner in a cat-fight on Corrie.
The bigger the hoopy ear-rings, the better the bitch.
Claire’s packed and left Ashley to his own devices when she moves in
with her mum. She’s too scared to stay in the house for fear of someone
burning her alive in her bed. But Ashley’s hoping for a bit of fire in the
bedroom and starts cosying up to Casey, Claire’s nemesis. No one yet knows
that Casey’s the fire-starter, twisted fire-starter. She wheedles her way
in with Claire at her mum’s house and later with Ashley who’s home alone
where there’s a gentle stroke of his hand across her baps. She made him
some lunch, dear, do keep up. And before you know it, Ashley’s kissed Casey
on the welcome mat after she spends the day looking after little Josh for
him.
Leanne’s staff walked out of the restaurant this week, her chef and
waiter have gone, leaving her in no doubt that they think her talents in
the catering business are equal to those she had on the game. Leanne lies
back and thinks of pizza margherita and how to repay Roger’s loan when
Janice tells Leanne that Roger’s skint and needs his money back, oh dear.
Best line of the week was Doreen and Rita in the restaurant having lunch.
Leanne: “Would you like a drink, ladies?”, Doreen: “Yes please, I hate
to eat on an empty stomach”. Leanne’s so desperate for cash that she even
asks Carla Connor to come into business with her. It was just like Dragon’s
Den. Carla offered twenty thousand pounds for sixty per cent of the business
but Leanne walked out in a huff. Paul takes Molly and Tyrone to the pizza
place for lunch and is disgusted by the state of the food, and who can
blame him? It’s all ready meals brought in from Freshco by Janice when
Leanne finds out there’s no food in the fridge for the agency chef to cook
up. Hang on, but isn’t Paul a chef? And doesn’t Leanne need, let’s see,
what was it again? A chef? I see a plot forming, it’s a shame that
Leanne and Paul haven’t yet.
Tyrone continues to feel pushed out at the Duckies when golden-balls
Paul, son of Terry (he who cannot be rubbished in the eyes of our Vera)
starts wheedling his way in to Jack and Vera’s lives.
Meanwhile at the butchers, Kirk is over the moon cutting and slicing
and naming all 14 cuts of a cow: “I love being a butcher, me”.
Sally feeds her desire to learn something new and while Janice rubbishes
her idea, Vicky supports her co-stitcher. Well, Vicky’s got a degree you
know. Sally aims to start an English course and Kev’s as supportive as he
knows how to be, although clearly disappointed his missus isn’t going to
study advanced toasting and postgraduate knowledge of beans.
Vernon heads off to Spain away from Weatherfield and Liz. Lloyd tells
him he’ll have a bevy of bikini clad beauties wanting to bang his bongos,
but Vernon only wants Liz yet feels he can’t live with her. Ah, but it
also turns out he can’t live without her either. Liz sneakily gives Lloyd
a tape cassette made up of her and Vernon’s special songs which she asks
Lloyd to play in his cab when he drives Vern to the airport. As the cab
drives Vernon away from the Street, the songs stir something in Vernon’s
heart. He gets Lloyd to turn the cab around, and Lloyd drives Vernon back
to the Street and into Liz’s waiting arms. Ah, bless. I do hope these two
get wed, it’ll be camp central on national camp day.
And that’s just about that for this week.
Glenda
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